For those of us who’ve moved our professional life into the home, expansion of remote work has allowed us to enjoy increased flexibility and convenience. However, it’s also brought new challenges, particularly when it comes to self-image and confidence.
Seeing our own face next to our colleagues on the screen in front of us during virtual meetings can add an extra layer of stress to our day (which may already be stressful enough). Instead of being mentally present in the meeting, we end up self-scrutinizing every angle, every flaw and defect while comparing ourselves to others.
This hyper-awareness is perfect for eroding self-esteem and finding “imperfections” you never saw before. Over time it will impact your daily life, affecting your relationships and your professional success. It could even lead to anxiety, depression, or body dysmorphic disorder. It’s a vicious cycle, as feelings of inadequacy increase they’re reinforced by spiraling self-critical thoughts, further diminishing self-image.
A simple first step to remove self-criticism from virtual meetings is to turn off self-view. We don’t observe ourselves during face-to-face conversations, and we don’t need to do it in virtual meetings either. It’s a small change, but it can significantly decrease self-consciousness. As a bonus, it allows you to focus on the conversation rather than your own appearance.
If you’re still worried about how you look, check your camera angle. Positioning it at eye level or slightly above will minimize distortion and show your most flattering perspective. You can also use filters, but they should be used in moderation. They’re a helpful tool for boosting confidence, however over-filtering can leave you looking fake.
Lighting is important to your appearance on camera. Where possible, sit in a well-lit space with light coming from the front. Harsh sunlight casts unflattering shadows on your face. You can also experiment with virtual backgrounds to give you an easy confidence boost (and can be a great ice-breaker when others ask about it).
Here’s a couple of extra tips to make virtual meetings easier to get through. Long periods of screen time can be taxing on both your eyes as well as your mental well-being. Take breaks between meetings, stepping away from the screen to stretch or do something around the house (I find this a great time to put on a load of laundry or make the next morning’s coffee ready to brew). These short timeouts can help you clear your head and refocus ready for the next meeting or task to be done.
Remember, you magnify flaws in your own head and your self-criticism comes from a distorted lens. The reality is, everyone else sees you with a much more flattering filter. So instead of looking for the negatives, if you’re stuck looking at yourself, look for your positives. Ultimately, it’s important to prioritize self-compassion. Your worth extends far beyond your physical appearance.